Neko-ken. Cat-fu. Cat-Fist fighting.

A powerful—nay, undefeatable—form of martial combat, and one or Ranma’s greater tragedies… following, of course, his Jusenkyo curse, his father, and his horrid case of "foot in mouth desease".

 

Ever since Genma’s (arguably second) most foolish training exersise, the sight or proximity of a cat has sent Ranma first into fits of terror, then fearful flight, then paralysis, then, finally, to the warped state of mind where he becomes both cat and master of cat-fist.

 

This is NOT the way things are meant to be. One who has received the -proper- training has no fear of cats… but, rather, often loves the small felines (and felines of all sorts, for that matter) and has an odd affinity for and kinship with them.

 

Very few are ever selected to be trained in the art of Neko-ken. Fewer still have the potential to actually learn it… fewer still can ever be called masters.

Consequently, it didn’t take very long for the single, solitary school which taught it—located even as remotely as it is—to catch word of Ranma, and the whole mess tangled therein…

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter One: A Debt To Be Paid

neko-sama@juno.com

read notes at the end

 

 

"Xian Mao!" called one of the many, many monks who—logically enough—populated the Wang-Mao-Yue temple.

Xian Mao looked up from his meditations upon the idol of Mao-Yue, the feline goddess to whom he owed allegiance. Not yet eighteen, and the only non-monk in the temple, he was a marvel to the monks, yet those facts and his long black hair had nothing to do with why he was so unique.

"Yes, Elder?" he asked. Despite his calm, respectful tone, the rebelliousness of a youth interrupted still came through… even if only in his eyes and his aura.

"A way for you to repay your debt has come to our attention." The Elder paused, "That is, of course, assuming that you still want to leave?"

"With all due respect, Elder," the boy replied with a small smile, "I do still wish to leave. There is Someone out there for me, and many tasks before me. You have taught me much, and allowed me to see many things. Could I truly repay you by staying here?

"No, elder, I must go out into the world. The time is soon.

"What is this task you have for me?"

The Elder smiled at the irony of the situation: this boy, whom he had personally rescued from the streets and named, whom he had selected to be his successor and pupil, who had mastered everything he had learned here at the Wang-Mao-Yue temple, and reached a spiritual plane that even he—the Elder—had yet to achieve, who had done the unbelievable and become the first in Generations to master the Neko-ken… a mastery which was obvious in his every movement, the very lines of his body, and, most clearly, his silver-blue slit-pupil eyes.

"You are aware, I believe, that there are many who train in the Neko-ken and fail to achieve mastery, are you not?"

"Of course, Elder. They are invariably killed in the process."

"That is what we have always held to be true. There appears, however, to be an exception…"

 

Xian Mao tugged at his short goatee and adjusted his glasses. He couldn’t quite decide who he felt more sorry for: this Saotome Genma, for being so incredibly stupid, or his son Ranma, for being subjected to that idiocy… Ranma, he decided quickly: the Gods watched over fools, not their victims.

"Elder, you need not even have asked. To correct Saotome Ranma’s training is my duty, privilege, and honor."

"I suspected you might feel that way," answered the old monk, smiling. "You are a noble soul, Xian Mao. There is one more thing, before you go."

"Yes?"

"Don’t forget to write."

 

 

On the roof of the Tendou Dojo, at very nearly midnight, Ranma slowly worked his way through a complex series of Katas.

Today had been BAD, by any standards. First, even before school had started, Kodachi had decided to get a jump on things by catching him early… even before he’d woken up. Of course, everyone had overreacted… as if it had been HIS fault, or something. He couldn’t help the way Kodachi acted… any more that he could have stopped Shampoo from accosting him at lunch, demanding that he eat her ramen—a risk in and of itself, most likely laced with magical herbs or some such; but with the prospect of eating what Akane had made for him on the other hand…

Not, of course, that he’d been given the chance to chose one, the other, or neither: before he could recover from Shampoo’s bicycle landing on his face, Akane had stormed off.

He’d even tried apologizing after school, but Ukyou had interrupted THAT affair.

Then Kuno, seeing Akane scream at him and storm off, had decided to vanquish the Vile Sorcerer Saotome…

Then Ryouga at the dojo that evening…

A bad day indeed, and something told Ranma that it would get worse before it got better… assuming that it ever did.

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

Xian Mao casually boarded the airplane from Hong Kong to Tokyo. He looked foreword to a relatively easy trip (after having walked 1500 miles from the middle of nowhere to Bejing, and then (after hitchhiking his way to the coast) swimming from the mainland to Hong Kong, he felt entitled to a small cheat: hence, after a few days of skilled begging, a little gambling, and several well-done arena battles, he had enough money for some food, a couple changes of clothes, and a dirt-cheep plane ticket to Tokyo.

From there, he’d find the Nerima District, and from there, he’d locate the Tendou Dojo, School of Indiscriminate Grappling. From there, he’d hunt down this odd and infamous Saotome Ranma.

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Two: Razor Edge of Ki

neko-sama@juno.com

credits and author’s notes at the end

 

 

It was raining, in Nerima. Raining in that melodramatic way that sometimes made Ranma wonder.

Alone in the Nekohountan, Cologne looked up, precisely as lightning crashed. "Something changes", she uttered in the way that she sometimes does.

Lightning crashed again, and the old ghoul went back to her meditations.

 

 

"RANMA, TODAY YOU DIE!!!!!"

It was a clear indication of how bad his week had been going that Ranma didn’t even face Ryouga, much less taunt him. A perfectly timed roundhouse kick launched Ryouga back into the skies from which he had descended.

Everyone backed off, even Akane. Cologne’s scheming and Shampoo’s antics, compiled by the Kuno sibling’s recent rampage had put Ranma’s temper on a razor edge that was beginning to frighten people. Even Akane, although she would never admit it. She couldn’t face ANY feelings she had regarding Ranma—not even fear—any more than he could his feelings toward her.

A lose-lose situation. Even for Saotome Ranma… who -never- lost.

 

 

Xian Mao smiled to himself, feeling his newly pierced ear. The lady had said six weeks until it healed. He’d laughed and said "Two." Not three days later, he had already replaced the piercing stud with a iridescent hoop, and had acquired two or three more formal earrings, as well.

Some wondered where the dirty Chinese boy acquired the money, and suspected the Yen coins to be stolen. In a way, he supposed they were… a fool and his money, after all. Could he truly be blamed if they were willing to make losing wagers like: "I bet you 1000 yen you can’t do that!"

A fool and his money…

… very, very swiftly parted.

 

 

To everyone’s delight and relief, it had been quiet around the Dojo for well nigh three days now. An optimist might have said that it meant the craziness was coming to an end. The Tendous, Ranma, and Genma were far to cynical for that sort of thing.

They were due. Overdue, in fact.

So they were, in some ways, less than surprised when a young man wearing small wireframe glasses, and Chinese robes resembling Mousse’s—dark blue with delicate silver workings—appeared at their doorstep early one Saturday afternoon.

"Can any of you direct me to Saotome Ranma?" was the even less surprising question, once Kasumi had let him in .

With a weary sigh, the entire Tendou household turned in perfect sync to point at the Dojo proper.

The young man smiled, bowed, and started walking toward the other building.

He stopped, then came back to the porch where Soun, Genma-panda, Nabiki, Kasumi, and Akane sat.

"Perhaps it would be better if I spoke with Saotome Genma, first."

Everyone looked at each other blankly, wondering weather or not to give away the panda—who was now playing with a large beach ball, trying very, very hard to be as inconspicuous as a pet panda could be.

A few moments of awkward silence passed, before the boy, tugging thoughtfully at an iridescent earring, adjusted his glasses and smiled.

"I know," he said with an unnerving calm, and a savage grin that revealed small Ryouga-style fangs and emphasised his cat-slit eyes… bringing to mind dark images of feral things.

With a speed that the Tendous has seen few others than Ranma use, the boy moved from the base of the porch steps to the grass by the Koi pond where the panda lay. A lightning fast kick cut the beach ball perfectly in half. Somewhere nearby, a cat howled.

 

 

Since arriving in Tokyo, it had taken Xian Mao nearly two weeks to locate Nerima. Once in Nerima, it had taken two days to find the Tendou Dojo… all of it footwork: seven out of ten people could give you perfect directions.

Upon reaching the Dojo, however, he’d discovered that he had no idea whatsoever of how to proceed. So, after thinking it over for several hours, he’d decided to make it up as he went along.

An error of judgment, he decided, looking down at the terrified Saotome Genma. So, he decided to change tactics.

"Saotome Genma," he intoned solemly, staring into the panda’s frightened eyes. "How did you learn of the Neko-ken?"

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

"Daddy, Mr. Saotome, be quiet." The middle daughter told the two older men, giving them a hard look. "I’ll handle this."

The girl turned her icy eyes to the Chinese boy.

"Now," she said, "down to business. Who are you, and how do you know who we are? Why do you want Ranma?"

"I am Xian Mao. You are rather infamous. And, if you answer my questions, I’ll answer yours."

The girls eyes gleamed. "This begins quite nicely…"

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Three: Who, What, Why and How

neko-sama@juno.com

credits and author notes at the end

 

 

Xian Mao shifted his stance, from former and proper, to more relaxed… more predatory.

"Your turn: who are YOU?"

"Us? But, I thought…" The girl negotiating on the other side of the table was caught off guard. Perhaps the one thing she hadn’t been prepared for.

"Answer. Simple introductions will be fine."

The girl blinked a couple more times before the calculating smile returned. "I’m Tendou Nabiki. That’s Tendou Akane—Ranma’s fiancee—{Akane: "It wasn’t my decision!"}, Tendou Kasumi, Tendou Soun, Saotome Genma.

"My turn: what’s YOUR beef with Ranma?"

"I have none. Why is that your first question?"

Nabiki blinked, again surprised. He was serious!

"Because, as a general rule, any guy who shows up here wants to kill Ranma."

"I’m not sure I even want to know. Your turn to ask."

"If you don’t want to kill Ranma, why are you here?"

"The Neko-ken. This one’s for Mr. Saotome: where did you learn of the Cat Fist?"

 

 

It didn’t take long for the trading of information to become a wholesale interrogation of Genma.

It turned out that the old man had found out about the technique from an old Grimoire of fighting styles, which had included a few notes about it’s training.

As usual, Genma hadn’t thought about the whole thing real hard. The pit of starving cats could hardly qualify, under any circumstances, for the "years of intensive Chi training" the tome had repeatedly mentioned.

So Genma had simply repeated the Cat Pit Test over and over again, until more harm than good had been done.

As the tale progressed, Xian Mao simply shook his head, face wet from tears by the end.

"… If the boy hadn’t been so week…" Genma was concluding. Xian Mao didn’t even stand up.

Three harsh syllables and a jabbing motion sent Genma soaring across the room in a blaze of silver-blue light, impacting against the wall with a hollow THUD.

"I -started- training at the age of six. Four years of Tai Chi later, I began the intense spiritual training that comes before any of the Five Tests. That training alone took just over five years. The Five Tests—most especially the Cat Pit, the second to last, and the Tiger’s Den, the final—are not taken untill everyone involved knows that the trainee will pass them.

"Do you have any idea how lucky you are that Ranma’s still alive? Much less human?"

 

 

After he had calmed himself down—not to mention cleared the image of Nabiki’s -very- fine legs out of his mind—he went in search of Ranma.

Xian Mao found him—or her, rather—sitting on the steps of the Dojo proper.

"Saotome Ranma?" he asked the attractive redheaded girl.

"Yeah." The girl sounded depressed, "Whatcha want?"

"And therein lies the problem…" he muttered.

 

 

… TO BE CONTINUED, IF YOU WANT IT TO…

 

This is hardly my first attempt at a fanfic, but it IS the first that will see usenet.

Consequently, any C&C is welcome. Feel free to send suggestions, commentary, thoughts, even flames (well, hopefully not flames… I prefer constructive critism).

Be sure to mail to neko-sama@juno.com. I don’t check the mail on the account I use to post (in light of the fact that it’s shared)

 

The basic Precept behind this fic is that the Cat Fu thing can’t be ALL bad, right? So, after reading Tiger Claw (by MadamHydra@aol.com… very nice, I might add), I got a few ideas and started writing.

 

I also will tend to use the manga as a reference, as opposed to the anime (notice the School of Indiscriminate Grappling? Issue One, page 4 (thereabouts) heh), with the exception of Onna-Ranma having red hair (there’s no indication of that in the manga)

 

Brief notes on Xian Mao ("Immortal Cat", translated w/ a spiffy table in Mystic China from Palladium Books [thanx guys]): stands about 5’7" (I’d guess… about the same height as Ranma, regardless), with black hair just past shoulder length, and is of mixed oriental ancestry (read: you can’t tell exactly where he comes from… just that he’s oriental), he’s got a pleasant sort of face, but isn’t really handsome. He’s got that fang thing going (like Ryouga), and has silver-blue-grey slit pupil eyes (like a cat’s).

He’s well versed in Magickal theory and practice, Chi/Ki (note that I’ll use both terms interchangeably… since they mean the same thing [trust me on this one]) theory and technique, and a few other things…

On the down side, he has less knowledge of how to deal with females… (well, he’s read a lot, and can give some DAMN good advice… … take that advice himself, on the other hand, well…. … ha, ha… good luck, guy… heh… he’ll never even try [hell, poor boy’s been in a monastery since he was four. He’s seen maybe… seven women his entire life.]

 

 

Standard Disclaimer: I don’t own these people (excepting the ones I do, like Xian Mao), Takahashi Rumiko-sama does. I claim no legal right to use and abuse them, I just do it anyway. Don’t sue me, it’ll waste more of your money than you can conceivably get out of me… since I ain’t got none. No offense is intended by illeagly using the Ranma cast & crew.

This is for personal entertainment only, save, post, and repost as long as the entire document stays intact and I get credited.

 

Thanx, hope ya liked.

 

 

 

Disclaimer: the standard bullshit. I don’t own any of the Ranma cast & Co. Takahashi Rumiko-sama and Viz Communications and a couple of other people do. So far, only Xian Mao and the Wang-Mao-Yue temple belong to me (since I made them up). Special Thanks go to the people who’ve inspired me to finally post: at the top of the list are Brett Handy (Oh My God? Series), Catbert25 (a whole slew of stuff), Marisa Price (A Lesson In Love), MadamHydra (Tiger Claw), and any anyone else who’s ever wrote a fic I’ve read.

 

 

 

Ranma wasn’t depressed… no, she was just too lazy to change back to a guy, right? Yeah, that was it…

"Bullshit," Ranma muttered, fanning herself with her shirt, exhausted from hard training and a long, tiring week… make that year… no, it really hadn’t been so bad at first, but… it had begun to wear on him/her ("What the hell am I, anyway?" Whispered the darkest part of Ranma’s mind.)…

Ranma sensed, more than saw or heard, the approach of the approach of another. Her depression was clearly displayed when she didn’t even bother to look up.

"Saotome Ranma?" asked a quiet, self-possessed voice. Male. Probably my age, Ranma thought.

"Yeah. Whatcha want?"

"And therein lies the problem…" the new boy mumbled.

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Four: The Problem At Hand

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

That caught Ranma’s attention.

"Whadda ya mean that’s the problem? You got somethin’ against me, too?"

The newcomer—dressed in blue Chinese robes, with beautiful workings of ornate silver vines and odd abstract characters—sighed and sat down beside Ranma with an fluid, almost inhuman, grace.

"No… nothing at all," he said quietly, putting a friendly arm over Ranma’s shoulder. The girl/boy flinched, and tried to draw back… not so much from the touch—it was purely friendly; there was no sexuality in it at all, neither the expected boy-to-girl sensual closeness that some forced on her, nor the man-to-man "so how’s it goin’, buddy?" bullshit—but from something else; something about this person somehow reeked of "cat". "But… I think other people do, don’t they?"

The boy’s silvery blue eyes met his own dark blue—eyes that terrified Ranma at the same time that they called out to something deep within him; eyes slit like a cat’s.

"My name is Xian Mao, and I’m something of a priest. Is there somewhere we can talk in private? I sense there is much you need to get off of your chest, so to speak…

 

 

An hour or two later, Ranma—boy-type, again—sat across from this Xian Mao on the roof of Furinken High, spilling his guts about… well, in essence, everything.

Toward the end, the Chinese boy had stopped asking questions, and had just listened.

When Ranma reached the present, some four and a half hours later, he somehow felt better…. Except for one thing.

"So… Xian Mao?"

"Yes?"

"Why do you care?"

Xian Mao thought about it for a few moments, then finally said: "Several reasons: first and foremost, the Neko-ken. That’s why I’m here in the first place, after all."

"What?"

"Yes. The Neko-ken. Has it ever occurred to you that there might be something wrong with turning into a cat? That that might not be quite it?"

Ranma thought about it for a few moments, "No, not really. Like I said, I don’t even remember what I do when I’m a cat… it took Akane forever to get it through her head that I couldn’t remember kissing her…"

Xian Mao smiled… not the frightening, feral smile that he’d given the Tendous, but a friendly smile that brought to mind a kitten’s contented purr.

"You wish you could remember, don’t you?"

"NO!!" Ranma yelled more out of instinct than true feeling. Xian Mao just laughed at him. "Okay, I guess… I… I’m not a pervert or nuthin’, but…"

Xian Mao was laughing so hard now that he couldn’t even sit up.

"HEY!" yelled Ranma, not liking being laughed at, "what’s the matter with you? It’s not like that!!!"

"Yes," Xian Mao laughed, suddenly more human and more an adolescent boy than he’d ever been since becoming a master of the Neko-ken, "it is! It is PRECISELY like that!"

 

 

After a few minutes, Xian Mao was finally able to pick himself up off of the floor.

"Okay, Ranma. This is how -I- see the situation."

Ranma froze, looking for all the world like a deer in headlights.

"You’re madly in love with Tendou Akane, but you’re afraid she doesn’t even want to be your friend, much less fiancee. You like this Kuonji Ukyou as a friend—a very good friend, at that—but nothing beyond that. You have no feelings whatsoever for this Shampoo, and would like to be her friend, but can’t trust her after some of the stunts she’s pulled; she does, however, make you very—what’s the word?--horny, and that makes you feel guilty, because you love Akane. Kodachi just scares the hell out of you.

"That about right?"

Ranma didn’t bother answering. He just gaped at the young priest.

"Okay, I’ll have mercy on you. You want to know what I have to do with you and the Cat Fist?"

Ranma nodded mutely.

"First, you weren’t trained properly… at all, in fact. That you managed to pick up anything at all is a minor miracle… that you lived, and are still recognizable as human are both MAJOR miracles.

"Second, I WAS trained properly."

"You…" Ranma stuttered, "know the Cat-Fist?"

"I do not ‘know the Cat-Fist’," said Xian Mao, shaking his head, "any more than you ‘know’ the Art of Indiscriminate Grappling. I am a master of the Neko-ken."

"Is that why you’re here?" Ranma asked quietly, after a few moments. "To kill me for abusing the Neko-ken… like those freaks from the Jusenkyou Curse Society?"

Xian Mao could read Ranma’s thoughts easily: Ranma thought so loud that the young "priest" could have heard them anyway… even if he hadn’t been deliberately listening in. Ranma had heard what he was capable of when he "went cat": rending wood, earth, and metal all with equal ease. What could someone who did it RIGHT do?

"No." Xian Mao said emphatically. "I told you I didn’t have anything against you, remember? I came here to try to finish your training."

"You did?" Ranma asked brightening. Maybe if the training was finished, he wouldn’t be afraid of cats any more.

The Chinese boy sighed. "I did, but I can’t."

"Why not?"

"Are you familiar with the principles of Yin and Yang?"

"Yes…"

"The Neko-ken draws exclusively from the Yin: from the Tiger, as opposed from the Yang Dragon. To learn the Cat Fist, you must be of Yin Nature, as I am. You are so incredibly, powerfully, fundamentally Yang that not only can you not learn the art of Neko-ken, it is amazing that it has not obliterated your soul."

 

 

"Ya mean, I can’t… that this’ll… that this’ll never get fixed?"

Xian Mao looked up again, that feral, wild, frightening, and feline look to his eyes, which shone like a cat’s behind the round wireframe glasses he wore.

"I never said THAT…"

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

As night was quickly approaching, Ranma and Xian Mao had returned to the Tendou household.

After explaining the situation—to the relief of much worry and tension (no one wanted another rival floating around. A friend was -very- welcome)—Xian Mao had let slip that he had nowhere to stay.

Soun had been quick to offer a room… only afterwards realizing that he had no spare rooms.

That was fine by him, the boy told them, the couch or even the floor was more than good enouh.

Soun would have none of it, and bunked Xian Mao with Ranma and Genma.

Nabiki had stormed off with a few remarks about what’s one more freeloader, after all?

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Five: Searching For A Solution

Part One: Furinken High

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

"So," Nabiki demanded of him early the next morning, the two of them awake before anyone else… even Ranma or his father. "What are you getting out of this?"

Xian Mao blinked at the young woman who glared down at him.

"Who says I have anything to gain?"

Nabiki’s stare didn’t waiver for a second. That particular line of thought (true charity, in other words) was so foreign to her way of thinking that she simply could not accept it’s possibility.

"Okay, so there is something in it for me, all right? Just don’t pass it around too much."

"Tell me what, why not, and I’ll think about it."

"First, I came as a way to repay my temple for raising me and training me: heal the wound we have indirectly caused, as it were. Second, in exchange for that healing—and a few other things—Ranma will train me in a less destructive form of martial arts."

Nabiki almost blanched. The School of Indiscriminate Grappling… LESS destructive? That, was a frightening thought.

"That seems pretty basic. Why shouldn’t I spread it around?"

The boy flushed slightly, "Well I’d like to keep -something- of an image of altruism… being a priest of sorts…"

"Fine. But you owe me."

"I what?"

"Keeping my mouth closed about you and your motives is a potential loss of Yen. In exchange, you owe me a small favor."

"A favor of equal proportion, then." The Chinese boy said smoothly, catching on to the way of things. "My image, for yours."

Nabiki chuckled softly, "You have potential, kid. But don’t try to haggle with the pros… my image is worth -far- more than yours."

Xian Mao shrugged, deciding to play a small trump. "If you say so. But I’ve managed to out-cheat a few Imps in the past… the only difference I note is that -you-, being very attractive, are far more distracting to look at."

Nabiki’s startled jerk told him that he’d played -that- card very well indeed.

"That so, is it?" she mumbled, a very small smile in her voice, as she left him to his meditations and returned to her bedroom.

 

 

"So," Ranma asked, trying very hard to be nonchalant, "is there any particular reason you’re following us to school?"

"The Neko-ken is not the only wound you have suffered. To heal it, I must examine the other wounds, and do at least minor repair work upon them." Xian Mao paused, smiling that feral smile again… the one that made Ranma twitch as if a cat were walking nearby, "I also wish to see just precisely what I’m getting myself involved in."

"I still don’t see why you want to help that perverted jerk." Muttered Akane, deliberately loud enough for both to hear.

"Hey, I—" Ranma began, but was interrupted by Xian Mao.

"Because it is my duty and my wish," he said plainly. "Besides, Ranma really isn’t that bad a guy, when he can keep his foot out of his mouth."

"Hey!" Ranma objected again, taking a quick swing at the other boy, who evaded easily by jumping down off the fence.

They walked on for a while in a companionable silence, Xian Mao interrupting on the few occasions where either Ranma or Akane started saying something stupid.

"So… how’s this gonna work?" Xian Mao asked as they approached the gates. "Is the school. just gonna let me walk on in without any comment?"

"Probably," said Ranma, shrugging. "My guess is that they’re so used to people following me around, they’ll be grateful for one who isn’t trashing the place."

Akane looked like she was about to say something. Switching to distraction mode (Xian Mao had already figured out that if either was allowed to respond to the other’s comments, hell would break loose), the Chinese boy asked for a quick rundown of the teachers.

What he got instead was an introduction to Principal Kuno.

"Ranma!" he cried out, almost as loud as his trademark Hawaiian shirt, a pair of hair clippers in each hand. "I see you’s bringin’ a new brudda wit’ ya! I gon shave his head, too!"

The deranged administrator came down in a perfectly aimed dive for Xian Mao’s head… only to crash into an unseen barrior about a yard away from his objective. The Chinese boy brought his prayer-clasped hands to his forehead, chanting quietly. Then, with a slow, derliberate movement, he pushed in the suspended principal’s direction. If Xian Mao’s movements were careful and slow, their effects were anything but: a blue-green glyph flashed between his hand and Principal Kuno’s body, a flash of light, and the principal was soaring into the atmosphere as surely as if Ranma had kicked him there.

Looking to Ranma and Akane, he asked: "Is that the worst of it, or have I made a mistake in coming to school with you?"

 

 

A few yards away, concealed by a tree, Gosunkugi blanched. He was anything but powerful, but slightly more sensitive than your average rock, and had felt the power behind the simple-seeming magick. Deep in his heart, he began to know fear, for if Ranma had allies like that…

 

 

Xian Mao bowed before the class. "I Xian Mao," he said with his very best ‘rural Chinese hick’ accented Japanese. "I from temple Wang-Mao-Yue, in Northeast China. I exchange student, study history, martial art."

"Okay, that’s done," muttered the sensei, "Xian-kun, please sit down, now."

"These people are all fools," he muttered to Akane as he sat down behind her.

"What do you mean?"

"Just… I dunno… so much goes on around here that they fail utterly to notice…" he paused, "or maybe just live in denial of."

 

At lunch, Ranma’s curiosity finally got the best of him.

"So… how exactly do you mean when you say you’re going to fix my Neko-ken? You said I can’t learn it…"

"You can’t?" asked Akane, surprised to find a martial art Ranma couldn’t master.

"No, he can’t," confirmed Xian Mao, giving her a brief explanation.

"So what can we do?" asked Ranma and Akane in unison… and utterly failing to notice their synchrony.

"Cure you of your phobia of cats," he said, shrugging with that near-inhuman grace he had. "To do that, however, I’ll have to help you develop a Kinship with them. To do that, I must help you Balance… do you realize that you have so little Yin that you shouldn’t even be able to sleep? Anyway, though… to help you achieve Balance spiritually, you must achieve it mentally… or at least be able to maintain it briefly."

He sighed. "The problem is, to do that, I’d have to solve your fiancee problem, and that’s where—pardon the expression—the shit hits the fan. I’ll be perfectly honest with you two: I grew up in a monastery. Before the past, say… three months—before I left the temple, in other words—I’d seen maybe… five, six, seven women. Grand total.

"Intellectually, I understand the spiritual and physical aspects of love and romance, but… frankly, poor Ranma here has more of an idea of what to do than me."

"That," said a new voice from behind him, "says a lot."

"Or," Xian Mao responded without the slightest hint of a start, "very little, depending on how you look at it."

He turned around to see an attractive young woman (DON’T… DO -NOT-… look at the… chest) dressed in a boy’s uniform with a humungous spatula strapped to her back.

"Judging by the fly swatter, I’d say you’re Ukyou." His mouth was on autopilot as his mind kept close watch on Ranma and Akane’s auras and tempers… friendliness (toward Ukyou) and nervousness (directed at Akane) in the former, guarded friendliness ( for Ukyou) and irritation/anger (directed at Ranma) in the latter. Not the very best of reactions…

Then the real fun began: a nearby wall collapsed, giving entrance to the purple-haired terror that could only be Shampoo.

Struck by a sudden inspiration as the voluptuous Amazon bounded toward Ranma, fully intending to glomp, Xian Mao tossed his glass of water on her.

Ranma shrieked at the appearance of a cat, who managed a perfect four-paw landing on his chest. To the shock of everyone watching, Xian Mao easily held Ranma in place, forcing him to face the small feline terror. Watching Ranma’s mind, Chi, and aura with all of his being, the Neko-ken master could feel the familiar presence of the Yin Incarnation filling Ranma… no! Not familiar! Tainted!

Bringing every fiber of his being into focus to avert the corrupted Tiger from claiming Ranma’s mind, he shifted away just enough focus to open his eyes and snarl: "Get rid of the cat. Now."

Akane and Ukyou, unable to see the Chinese boy’s battle aura, but more than able to feel the burning cold of it, simultaneously grabbed the frightened Shampoo-cat and flung her out the hole she had so conveniently made in the wall.

The object of Ranma’s phobia now removed, so fled the fear, and with it the tainted Incarnation.

With a gasp, Ranma fell to his knees, drenched in sweat.

"Someone," snarled Xian Mao, "tell Saotome Genma that he’d better sleep somewhere secret tonight; because, if I see him before I calm down, the man will DIE!"

 

 

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

well, another couple chapters written, and still no responces (not that the first three seem to have even hit the newsgroup yet... oh, well. i just like bitching.)

 

if Xian Mao has so liitle experience with women, you may be wondering, why's he doing so well so far? because (even with Nabiki, who still distracts him at first, if you might notice) he's not dealing with them as WOMEN, just as PEOPLE. you may have, however, noticed the (DON'T look at... chest) thing? that sort of distraction will become more of a problem as Xian Mao comes more an more into personal contact with women/girls... after all, there's only so long you can ignore those raging hormones :)

 

any C&C, flames, suggestions, or recomendations to read other people's fics are just fine... welcomed, embraced even!

 

talk to me people, please! don't let me waste away... *sniff*

 

later!

 

 

 

Insert Standard Disclaimer/Legal Bullshit HERE.

 

 

"Who was that Chinese kid?" Ukyou asked Akane, as they dragged a semi-conscious Ranma to the nurse’s office. "And what happened to Shampoo? And what’s up with -this-?"

The last was accompanied by a gesture to the gibbering Ranma.

"Do you know anything about Cat-Fu?" asked Akane.

"Cat fist? No, why?"

"Well, it kind of goes like this…"

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Five: Searching For A Solution

Part Two: A New Problem

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

On the top of the school building, Xian Mao moved silently through a long series of Tai Chi exercises. His battle aura was flaring pearl white around him, easily visible to those who had the eyes to see. It was long after the last bell had rung before his aura was at a level that most martial artist would have considered normal… normal, that is, for a pitched battle.

Working slowly, deliberately through the kata-like movements, it was nearly dusk before he trusted himself.

Bringing his palms together, and bowing his forehead to his fingertips, the young, would-be priest whispered a desperate prayer in the odd Chinese dialect that was his native tongue: "Here me ancestors, though my mother abandoned me… my blood is your blood, one and the same… aide me, please, in this task… I do not think I can manage it of my own."

 

 

Cologne nodded with interest as Shampoo told her of this afternoon’s events. Someone appearing from nowhere, looking for Ranma was status quo.

The only difference, hear, lie in that this boy seemed to be an ally to her Son-in-law.

"Grandmother," Shampoo pressed on hesitantly, after a few moments of silence, "there something else about new boy."

"Yes, go on."

"He aura very strong… very strange… like yours when you cast spell."

 

 

"DIE RANMA!!!"

Xian Mao could hear the cry as if it had been uttered beside him… still three blocks from the Tendou Dojo. Safely assuming that that was not a good sound, the Chinese boy changed mindset, and shifted into Phase One of the Neko-ken. A couple short hops and a nearly four-legged sprint brought him to the Tendou’s wall in less than a third of the time that walking would have taken.

Perched on said wall, Xian Mao tried to take in what was happening.

Ranma was faced off against another boy, probably about the same age, but large of frame. The brown and yellow clothes, bandanna, umbrella, and raging battle aura quickly brought him to the conclusion that this was the Ryouga of which Ranma had spoken.

An assessment of the damage which had already occurred—shattered gate, blast holes (presumably from the Breaking Point Technique), and a piece of decimated statuary—gave him the impression that if someone didn’t intervene, there would be quite a bit more damage.

So Xian Mao fell deeper into the Neko-ken: from First Phase, Movement; to Third Phase, Territorial Defense. As he brought the Yin Incarnation closer, the little Yang he possessed Manifested itself in a cat-shaped aura.

From nearby allies, the yowls of tomcats and the crashing of garbage cans could be heard, as the local feline population fled the range’s new master.

 

 

Ryouga watched in fascination as Ranma’s usual cocky grin collapsed.

"C-cat…" he murmured, curling around himself.

Before Ryouga could take advantage of the situation, however, something struck him in the chest, sending him soaring into the wall that surrounded the Tendou residence, which spiderwebbed with cracks.

The lost boy cried out in agony as something flayed his battle aura to shreds.

When he could open his eyes again, Ryouga saw something crouching between himself and the quaking Ranma. The figure was transformed into a shadow by the dusky light, but it could still be identified as human—something in his mind registered that this was good, it probably wasn’t a demon—but the eyes glowed a pale, frightening blue, and it’s movements looked like a tiger on the prowl. The worst part was the battle aura… perfectly stable, it was a shadowy feline shape.

The shape lunged, and Ryouga faced Death with a sad smile…

…right up until the aura dissipated. Then he returned to his secondary state: confusion.

The figure landed silently beside him. Ryouga would have done something—struck out, spoken, something… anything—but the mere thought of moving sent pain shooting trough his body.

The figure placed his hand on Ryouga’s Third Eye Chakra, and the pain subsided.

"Hello," it… no, he, said. "My name is Xian Mao. I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you, but it would be ill repayment to the Tendous, who have been so gracious as to house me, if I did not defend the territory.

"Go, now. I must help Ranma… but, should you ever need help yourself, or even just someone to talk to, I am a priest of sorts, and I would be glad to help you, as well."

 

 

"Hey, Xian Mao!" called out Akane in a friendly sort of way. "Where’ve you been? You didn’t come home, but we hid Mr. Sao… WHAT HAPPENED TO RANMA?"

"I’m not sure… I used the Neko-ken to break up a fight between him and a kid with an umbrella… Ryouga, I think his name is."

"Was that baka picking on poor Ryouga again?" Akane’s quickly hidden concern had been converted to irritation.

"As far as I could tell, it was this Ryouga who started it," Xian Mao said, shaking his head.

Akane just "hrumph"ed as Kasumi walked in.

"Oh, there you are Xia—oh, my! What’s wrong with Ranma?"

Xian Mao set Ranma down on the couch and shrugged. "I don’t know. He and Ryouga were fighting, and I…

"Oh, shit."

"Xian Mao!" Kasumi was shocked at such language.

"What’s wrong?" demanded Akane.

Ranma groaned, returning to consciousness.

"Ranma was muttering ‘cat’…" Xian Mao shook his head, very much less than pleased. "The aura of the Neko-ken… it set off his fear of cats…

"This is not a good sign…"

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

Genma had snuck back into the house sometime that night, but no one really cared. Xian Mao was no longer in danger of killing him, so it didn’t really matter.

No one said much at breakfast, that morning… nothing had really gone wrong, but no one wanted to push the issue for some reason.

Nor did anyone comment on the fact that Xian Mao did not eat breakfast, or go to school with Ranma and Akane again. He was out back, on the rocks by the Koi pond, practicing his Tai Chi.

Just as breakfast was being finished, Cologne appeared from nowhere, landing on the table with her pogo staff.

"Where is the new boy?" she demanded.

They pointed to the Koi pond.

Nodding thanks, Cologne hopped out the back door.

As Ranma, Akane, and Nabiki left for school, Kasumi, Genma, and Soun gathered on the back porch to watch what they new might become something of a show.

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Six: Amazon Enemy

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

As if oblivious to the scrutiny of Cologne and the others, Xian Mao continued the graceful art that was Tai Chi. Wave upon waves of Yin washed off of him. A silvery-white, ice cold aura surrounded him.

He was dressed much like Mousse, in flowing Chinese robes patterned dark blue on white. Also like Mouse, he practiced without a shirt. The Chinese boy was not incredibly handsome—any one of the other prominent males of Nerima, save perhaps Kuno or Gosunkugi, had him beat hands down—but he was better muscled, and better built than any save the well-traveled, and very powerful Ryouga. While no beauty, he was hardly painful to look upon.

Long minutes passed, and nothing happened.

Then, still without acknowledging his watchers, Xian Mao shifted into the First Phase of the Neko-ken. His movements, already unnaturally fluid and precise, acquired a preternatural, inhuman grace.

More long minutes, as local cats began to howl, the feline cries growing ever nearer.

Cologne gestured, and a "bubble" of light, almost like the streakiness of heat rising off of the highway, surrounded the boy.

The dance ended, and Xian Mao bowed to the old ghoul.

"Greetings, sorceress. Allow me to assess the situation: we have both demonstrated patience, in waiting for the other to make the first move. I have demonstrated that I have power, in the Cat Fist, and can summon allies. You have demonstrated that your power can contain mine, at that level.." the boy stood from his bow, and adjusted his glasses and earring—a simple turquoise teardrop, today—before sitting in a respectful manner. "Taken to the next step, I would demonstrate, or try to, that I could break out of your containment; you would respond. Taken to the ultimate end, we would most likely end in a wizard’s duel.

"I think that neither of us desire this costly, exhausting end.

"Perhaps we can reach a middle ground in some other fassion?"

 

 

Khu Lon smiled. The boy was amazing! He had, without breaking stride once, worked through his Tai Chi exercises for over an hour and a half straight, then, again without breaking stride, opened the First Door of the Cat Fist, and used the Kinship to call to nearby ally cats for aide.

On top of that, he had recognized her intentions without the slightest blink of those intriguing cat-slit eyes.

"Perhaps we can reach a middle ground in some other fassion?"

Khu Lon hopped down from her staff, ancient eyes twinkling in delight.

"That would be very good. Kasumi, dear? Could you call the Neko-hanten and ask Xian Pu to close the resteraunt and come here? I need her to perform a proper Amazon Diplomatic Ceremony."

 

 

"Ah!" said Kasumi, when she answered the door, a few minutes later. "Shampoo! You look lovely! Please come in!"

Shampoo smiled a little, idly plucking at the elaborate formal dress that showed everything off, revealed nothing, and made moving damned near impossible. She -did-, however, look devastatingly beautiful.

Xian Mao, upon seeing her, quickly forced down his own—perfectly natural, and very male—reaction to the Amazon maiden’s appearance, replacing it with "thanks be to the Ancestors, that Ranma and Akane can’t see her now!"

Shifting thought patterns subtly, he transformed from young, naïve and lonley (where’d that come from?) would-be priest, to diplomat, merchant, and the master of Neko-ken who’d once beat a full-fledged Demon at his own game.

Without speaking, Shampoo pulled a full table and two chairs out of the air, and set them up near the Koi pond along the principles of Feng Shui… arranged in a perfectly neutral positioning. Quickly, goblets and a bottle of wine appeared, and she gestured for Xian Mao and Cologne to sit.

"I am Khu Lon," the old woman introduced herself in Mandrin, "Amazon Elder of Joketsuzoku Village. As an Elder, I shall lead the way."

"I am Xian Mao," the boy stated politely, sitting down only after Khu Lon had, and answering in the same language, "Acolyte of Wang-Mao-Yue, of Her temple, master of the ancient Neko-ken. As a youth, I am the way you wish to lead."

"And now we shall see whether or not I will, in truth, lead?" Khu Lon chuckled. "Oh, my boy. That is in no way contested. I -SHALL- lead the way… your way, Xian Pu’s way, Mu Tsu’s way, Son-in-Law’s way… I shall lead them all.

"Now, boy. Why are you here?"

"I am here for Ranma. We are… useful to one another. You, however, from what I can tell, are useful to no one. You would take all the lives around you and weave them into the image that pleases you, regardless of their wishes. Worse than useless, you are dangerous. Why are You here?"

"The same as you: Son-in-law. And I am dangerous to none save my enemies. Are you among them?"

"That is your decision, rather than mine. I would say no, but you are of Joketsuzoku; your people and mine have a history… a very long one, none of it pleasant. So long as you stay out of my way, I will stay out of yours."

"And what is your way?"

"Approximately perpendicular to yours."

 

"You are walking on very thin ice, boy." Kho Lon snarled, loosing much face along with her composure. "I was willing to ignore your insolence, but should you actually cross me, neither your pathetic knowledge of the Cat Fist nor your petty magicks will be enough to stop me."

"You have no idea, do you, of just precisely who I am?"

"You are NO ONE!"

"I am Xian Mao!" he snapped, anger leaking into his tone, but his composure still mostly intact. "You of Joketsuzoku have been out of touch for too long, old woman. Ask one of your sister tribes, and they shall tell you. I am well known, to those who care to ask."

 

 

"I have one last question, Khu Lon," said Xian Mao quietly, as the Amazon matriarch turned to leave, quivering with rage. "Why do you continue to throw Xian Pu at Ranma? Neither one is interested in the other."

Xian Pu flinched, wondering how this stranger new her darkest secret. Could he truly be who he said he was?

"It is her duty, and my honor at stake."

Xian Mao just shook his head, tracing an odd symbol in the air. "May you learn the falseness of your words, ‘fore you pass from this world."

Snarling, very nearly frothing at the mouth, Khu Lon vanished.

"You have made an enemy this day, Xian Mao," Xian Pu stated formally, then, turning a desperate look at him, "How do you know… ?"

He smiled slightly. "I am an empath… though not that good. I saw you flinch every time Ranma was mentioned, especially when Khu Lon called him ‘son in law’."

"I… I…" Xian Pu stuttered, then said: "I hope I do not have to kill you."

 

 

 

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay, there are another two chapters.

I hope y’all are liking it so far.

 

There are a couple things I might as well explain in the Author’s Notes, so I don’t have to fuck up trying to put it in the prose:

There are nine different levels of the Neko-ken, called Phases. Each successively brings the martial artist closer to the "Yin Incarnation", literally the Yin Principle of the Universe itself, Manifesting in the form of a elemental force or being. Accessing each of the phases is sometimes called opening the door or gate.

They go something like this:

1 Movement

2 Flight (as in Panicked Flight From the Enemy)

3 Defend Territory

4 Defend Self

5 Defend Ally

6 Conquer

7 Destroy

8 Defend Mate (as in wife or husband or "partner")

9 Vengeance/Annihilation

As a general rule, the eighth and ninth Phases cannot be accessed consciously (you open those doors ONLY when you REALLY need them.

Technically, there is a Tenth Phase, called the Great Gate

10 Yin Avatar

In this Phase one literally becomes an Avatar of the Yin Incarnation. Unfortunately, no one has ever managed to "close" the Great Gate after having "opened" it.

 

Khu Lon/Cologne is probably assuming that Xian Mao is exaggerating or mistaken when he calls himself a master, and would be surprised if he could go beyond the Third Gate… Fourth, at best. She is really, truly, in for a surprise.

 

I’m not sure what happened between the Wang-Mao-Yue temple and the Joketsuzoku Amazons, but it’s not really important (truth be told, the Amazons probably don’t remember the argument at all, much less what started it), and the monks of the temple consider it water under the bridge.

Xian Mao was just using it as a reason to be pissed off at Khu Lon/Cologne… not that he really needed one, the way she was coming on.

 

Yes, before you as, I do intend to do the "standard" Mousse-Shampoo hook up, no I haven’t the foggiest how to do it (any suggestions would be GREATLY appreciated), and I’d like to take a vote: hook Ryouga up w/ Ukyou or send him of to find Akari (who I’ll probably not involve in the story)?

Here’s the ballot:

A_____ Ryouga-Ukyou

B_____ Ryouga-Akari (who do I set Ukyou up w/ then?)

Any and all comments, criticisms, complaints, compliments, bitching, flames, raving, love letters, and anything but SPAM is welcome and invited!

Please talk to me, people!

 

I’m at neko-sama@juno.com. the other e-mail (the one I post with) is the family account and I dont check it! so if you mail there anyway, at least put my name in the header: "Jeff"

 

Thanx for reading, I’ll see you whenever I get the next chapters posted!

 

 

 

You know the routine: the legal bullshit goes here. On with the show

 

 

When Ranma and Akane finally made it home from school—they’d been delayed by the Kuno sibs—they found Xian Mao dancing on the front porch.

Well, not quite dancing. It was like Tai Chi—they’d all seen that sort of thing before—combined with a Karate kata, combined with Aikido mind-body exercises, set to dance music that no one could hear. The young man moved with his normal fluid grace, and a speed and coordination that spoke of one who had used this exercise to relieve stress many times.

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Seven: First Step to the Cure

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

As the young couple—who would deny that identification vehemently, loudly, and violently—watched, Xian Mao changed from unarmed katas to staff movements. He had no weapon, but at the moments of imagined impact, they could see a bar of light flash in his hands: his Ki manifesting in the visible spectrum, not as an aura, but as a weapon.

Ranma, well-aware of the difficulty of Ki manipulation, began to wonder if his position as greatest martial artist in Nerima was still secure.

It only took a couple minutes for Xian Mao to realize he was being washed. Red-faced from embarrassment, the master of Neko-ken laughed a little as he bowed.

"Ranma-kun, Akane-chan, how has your day been?"

Laughing at the flustered boy, the two told of their hectic but amusing day.

"… and then, just as I was about to have to take Kuno down, Hinako-sensei drained him."

"She looked like she was going to drain Ranma, too," Akane went on, "but she couldn’t because he hadn’t actually done anything, yet."

"And Kodachi?" Xian Mao asked with intrest.

"We’re not quite sure what happened to her," confessed Ranma.

Obscene, insane laughter echoed across the dojo yard.

"Speak of the Devil," Ranma and Xian Mao muttered to themselves.

"Oh, Ranma-sama!" the maniacal, ribbon-wielding she devil that was undeniably Kuno Kodachi called as she landed in front of the trio. "How is my darling? And who is this new boy?"

"I’m Xian Mao," he said before Ranma’s mouth could open and allow access to his foot. "You must be Kodachi."

"Oh! So my Ranma-sama speaks of me, does he?"

"Yes. In approximately the same terms one would speak of a serial killer or a rabid animal."

"Lies! My Ranma-sama and I love each other! He…"

"If he loves you so much, why hasn’t he run up to embrace you?"

That stopped Kodachi dead still. Ranma and Akane stared at him.

This was perhaps the first time ANYONE had managed to shut Kodachi up.

"Be-because…" the psychotic gymnast stammered after a few moments. "He fears Akane’s retribution… she’s always striking him with that awful mallet…"

Akane, glaring at Ranma as if that might be just the case, started reaching into hammerspace for her mallet.

Ranma, knowing what was coming, edged back: Kodachi was approaching the truth, and Akane DID look pissed off.

"In a word: bullshit." Xian Mao said flatly, drawing the attention once again of everyone involved. "We both know that Ranma can avoid Akane any time he chooses. He could just vanish, he could dodge her attacks, he could even defend himself. He doesn’t."

"My Ranma is too honorable to strike a woman."

The young priest/monk/martial artist looked over to Ranma: "Correct me if I’m wrong here, but isn’t that the only reason you haven’t kicked the shit out of psycho-chick, here?"

Kodachi’s eyes blazed with rage at the double insult. This strange boy in Chinese robes had not only turned away and spoken as if she wasn’t there, but he’d called her -names- of all things!

"Come on, Ranma," probed Akane, irritated at Kodachi and taking it out on Ranma (as usual), and, also, genuinely interested in the answer. "Is that it?"

Ranma stuttered for a few moments, looking around helplessly. Akane was getting pissed, and if he denied it he’d make her even madder and encourage Kodachi’s advances; if he ‘fessed up, Akane probably wouldn’t believe him (although if she did, he’d likely get to see her smile), and he’d have Kodachi mad at him: not even a Kuno could refuse the truth of a direct answer.

A loose-loose situation, because he knew, somehow, that Xian Mao would not let him back out, just as he -knew- that this time there would be no interruptions. Then, as he met the other boy’s eyes—frightening and cat-like though they were—he also -knew- that, whatever he said, Xian Mao would back him up, and see to it that he escaped alive; Xian Mao had deliberately gotten him into this position for his own good, and would see to it that Ranma survived to see that good.

For the first time in his life, Ranma felt confidence that he’d come out all right in a verbal, emotional confrontation. He could tell the truth, and live to see the setting sun.

"Well, Ranma?" demanded a very angry Akane. "Is that it, or do you -want- to be with Kodachi?"

"Actually," Ranma said, surprising her with his sudden self-confidence, "Xian-kun, here, has it about right."

Dead silence. For a full minute, dead silence.

Then Kodachi shrieked, slipping beyond the level of "crazy" into true madness. Eyes blazing with incoherent rage, she lunged at Ranma, hands twisted into claws.

For the first time since the Fifth Testing, Xian Mao did not -think- about accessing the Neko-ken. He just -DID-. The Fifth Door opened itself, with neither conscious thought nor deliberate will… but neither did Xian Mao fight it. He just used it for it’s only true purpose: the defense of an ally.

A back handed slash which did not even land, physically speaking, sent Kuno Kodachi soaring back and out the gate to the Tendou residence. Xian Mao had hit her with the incredible precision of one who does not even need to think about his actions: a perfectly aimed blow to deflect more than to harm, with just enough strength to send her soaring, and only enough power to disrupt her Ki field, but not actually harm her life-force.

Then, just as Xian Mao closed the Door, the cat-aura of the Neko-ken hit Ranma.

The boy/girl became cat.

 

 

Ranma-neko jumped over Xian Mao, who’d been sitting between himself and Akane. Ranma-neko snarled, and took a combat stance.

The Neko-ken master backed off quickly, trying to figure out precisely what had happened, and what was going on, now.

Ranma-neko sat himself in Akane’s lap continued to glare at Xian Mao, who began to laugh.

"What’s so damned funny?" demanded Akane, who was less than pleased at having Ranma in his cat form again.

"Ranma…" Xian Mao chortled, "Even in the throes of… -this-, he still sees you as his mate!"

"I’m not…!" Akane broke off. "What do you mean?"

"Ranma’s a cat right now. I am, in his eyes, another cat—he can most likely still feel traces of the Neko-ken in me. As a cat he doesn’t want another cat in his territory. I’m a bigger cat, though, so he has to put up with that. He does NOT however, have to put up with me—the other cat—trying to take his mate away: namely you."

"Hunh?"

"You… he’s defending his mate from an invading tomcat!"

"But he’s a cat right now, he’s…"

"Akane," Xian Mao said, mirth leaving his tone. "You know as well as I do… better, really… that this IS Ranma. He just sees the world through the eyes of a cat now.

"Cats do not lie to themselves, Akane, and very rarely do they lie to one another."

"But… But…"

"This, Akane-chan, is how Ranma really feels."

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

The sun rose on Xian Mao’s forth day in the Dojo… it was Wednesday, now.

One down, two to go, he thought to himself. At least, he hoped Kodachi was out of the running. Even if she didn’t pursue Ranma any more, though, Ranma had gotten that solved in his own mind, and Akane knew now what was going on there.

More importantly, Akane had something of a better idea what was going on with Ranma.

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Eight: Negotiations Toward Beginnings

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

Last night, as Ranma-neko sat in Akane’s lap, purring contentedly, Akane and Xian Mao had had a long talk.

"I don’t know," Akane had said helplessly, "every time we’re alone, we either start fighting, or someone… interrupts us before we can even -say- anything, much less -do- anything…"

Xian Mao smiled a little, "Ranma complained of the same thing."

"What? When?"

"That first night I arrived, Ranma and I had a long talk. He… said a few things that I don’t think he’d want anyone to know he said… I don’t think he knows just how easy he is to read."

"Really? What did he say?"

"Did I not just say ‘things he wouldn’t want anyone to know he said’?"

"Well…" Akane had said, blushing.

Xian Mao had smiled, and smiled again in the remembrance.

"Among them was a complaint that the two of you never really had any time alone." a paused. "If I could arrange it, and get Ranma to agree, would you take advantage of it?"

After a few moments, Akane had nodded. "Yes. When?"

"Tomorrow, after school. I’ll have the Dojo set up so that no one can bother you."

"Why are you doing this?" Akane had asked suddenly. "Did our fathers set you up to this?"

"No. Nothing of the sort."

"Then why?"

"First, because if I’m to cure Ranma of his fear of cats, and his tendency to do… this… he has to be in better emotional balance. To do that, I have to help him work out some of his emotional difficulties.

"Frankly, you, and his relationship with you, seem to be the primary factors of his stress… not even his father can compare. Second…"

"Second?"

"Because I’m a hopeless romantic, and I’d like to help you two, if not come together, at least work out the terms of your friendship and whether or not you want this whole shebang to happen."

 

 

Now, as the sun dawned on this fine, Wednesday morn, Xian Mao contemplated his next step. After he’d brought Ranma out of his cat-mode—an ability that derived from his mastery of the Yin Incarnation, and one that both Ranma and Akane were very grateful for.

As he and Ranma has sparred briefly the previous evening—the beginning of the training Ranma had agreed to give in return for curing his cat phobia, to analyze just what he knew without the Cat Fist—and afterwards, they had talked. Some about Kodachi, some about Xian Mao’s own adventure that day, some about Ranma’s fiancee problem. Just before they went in for the night, he had made his proposal.

"Ranma, if you were given the opportunity for, say, an hour alone with Akane—no interruptions, no spies, nothing—would you take it? An opportunity to talk, to find out just what it was you wanted out of your relationship? Be it friendship, marriage, utter separation, whatever?"

A slight pause as Ranma thought. Then, with no hesitation whatsoever, "Yes."

"After school tomorrow, in the dojo."

Now, tomorrow was here, and he had to prepare.

So, on the rocks by the Koi pond, he meditated, drawing Power into himself, and beginning the weavings of the spells he would use to protect the dojo.

"Why are you hooking them up?"

Xian Mao started, looking to the voice behind him. It was Nabiki.

"Several reasons. Do you object?"

Nabiki shrugged, "No, but I stand to loose a lot of income if Ranma’s problems get resolved."

"There are other was to make money."

"True enough. So, why?"

"First and foremost, duty. I have a duty to help Ranma with the Cat Fist. Because the temple where I was raised and trained is the only place on the face of this earth where one can learn the Neko-ken, we hold ourselves responsible, directly or indirectly, for the actions of those who learn the technique. Indirectly, we are responsible for Ranma’s problem… Saotome Genma is directly responsible, but it is our shame that he was able to learn the little he did, and put Ranma through the hell of the Fourth Test. To do what I must, however, Ranma’s mind must be calm… which can only be achieved by helping him through his emotional turmoil.

"Also, I hope… I hope that by helping Ranma with -his- romance, I can have a better idea of how to manage my own love interests."

Nabiki quirked an eyebrow. "You’re a well spring of information this morning. Any chance you’ll tell me who that love interest is? None of my sources have reported any moves made on your part. Someone back in China?"

"None of the information I’ve given has been worth much. And, no, she’s not back in China. … Wanna know why your sources haven’t reported any moves made?" Xian Mao grinned a little.

"Sure."

"Because I haven’t really made that many."

"Oh? So who is this girl you’ve set your heart on?" Nabiki wasn’t sure why she was pestering Xian Mao for the information. It was of almost no importance whatsoever. Maybe it was because he didn’t seem to have fallen for Akane, as so many seemed to have.

"Really want to know?"

"Sure."

"You."

Stunned silence. A shove sent the Chinese boy into the pond, but if she had hoped Xian Mao was another victim of Jusenkyou, she was disappointed.

 

 

"The nerve!" Nabiki fumed as she walked to school. "He deliberately led the conversation to that point!"

Of course, at a certain level, she had to admire the way he’d pushed and prodded her into asking the right questions. Everything snapped into place, every piece of dropped information, every odd phrase, suddenly made sense. Now, she couldn’t doubt his claim to have out-cheated an Imp… he had managed to trick her with goals she hadn’t thought of, working perfectly to achieve two or three separate goals, and sacrificing strategically useless information in exchange for what -he- felt to be important.

"Boss?" asked Natsuko {A.N.: I’ve never actually picked up the names of Nabiki’s two partners in crime; this was the first thing that came to mind. If you happen to know their names, e-mail me, I’m curious}. "What’s the matter? You seem out of sorts this morning…"

Nabiki told her two companions precisely what was the matter. At great lengths, and with no few explicitives.

"Personally, Boss, I think you should go for it."

"What?"

"Yeah, if nothing else, you could learn from him. Think about it: he hasn’t been around long enough to owe you anything, or to have any grudges against you. He’s only been to school one day, so he doesn’t even know what other people think of you…"

"A perfectly clean slate," agreed Mariko {A.N.: yup, that’s my name for the other one. Lame, ain’t it?}. "And he -is- pretty well built…"

"You two are crazy."

"C’mon, Boss, don’t tell me you never get lonely?"

Nabiki grabbed her two cohorts by the collars of their uniforms, and slammed them against the wall.

"You two -can’t- have any idea how lonely that madhouse I’m forced to call home is! My older sister has Dr. Tofu so madly in love with her that he literally can’t remember where he is when he sees her. My younger sister has every male in the school chasing after her. Ranma has -three- women, in addition to Akane, who want to fuck him blind.

"You cannot -possibly- know how lonely I get in the dark hours of the morning!"

"So, Boss," choked Natsuko, pressing the point for some reason that was beyond all logic save that it was the will of the Gods, "why are you throwing this opportunity away?"

 

 

Back at the Tendou residence, Xian Mao was weaving his spells around the Dojo. Protections from everything he could think of: evil, demons, gods, snakes, spiders, insects, the Evil Eye, magic, the intentions of others. Capped by a solid Barrier Wall that all but drained his magickal energy. It was all he could do to stand when he finished a little after noon.

Now, to rest. He had to have enough strength, when the time came, to let Ranma and Akane -IN- to the sanctuary he’d spent the entirety of the morning creating.

 

 

 

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

well, what do you think?

Anyone see it coming? Yes/no?

aw, c’mmon! Tell me!

 

Not much to say this time, except to apologize for not knowing the names of Nabiki’s two partners in crime.

So, I took advantage of something called "artistic license" and came up with names on the spot. Fun, hunh?

My little brother wants the computer, now, though, and I’m out of creative power for now, so I’ll write more… later.

 

Please! C&C to neko-sama@juno.com!

 

 

 

"So, how’s it going?" Nabiki asked, looking at the shimmering black bubble surrounding the dojo building. Xian Mao, exhausted, sat with his back against said bubble, which had been the work of over four hours of intense ritual magick.

"They’re in there," he replied with a gusty, tired sigh. "and they will continue to be in there until they choose to come out… or dawn tomorrow, whichever comes first."

"Any idea what’s going on in there?"

"None."

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Nine: Choices Made

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

 

"So… how’re you doing?"

"I’m exhausted, to be honest. I don’t think I could stand up if I wanted to."

Silence, for a while.

"I’m… sorry I pushed you into the pond."

Another sigh. "It’s okay. I propositioned you, you rejected me. End of story, right?"

"Well, actually…"

Xian Mao raised an eyebrow, wondering if for once he was going to get something without some sort of sacrifice… his pride had been traded for the spiritual training, his innocence for the Five Tests, his humanity for the Neko-ken. Perhaps, just once, he might get away intact…

"… I was wanting to reconsider…"

Xian Mao reached out his hand. "Care to be friends while you think about it?"

Nabiki smiled and took his hand in a firm shake. "Yes."

 

 

An hour passed, and then another. Still, the bubble stood intact. The mercenary girl and the priestly boy sat together on it’s perimeter, sometimes talking, sometimes just sitting.

They went in and ate when Kasumi called them to dinner, both wondering just what to do with themeselves… and each other.

"Where are Ranma and Akane?" asked Kasumi in her usual innocent way. "I haven’t seen them since right after school."

Xian Mao looked across the table to Nabiki. "Should I tell?"

She thought about it, then nodded. "Yeah, nothing anyone can do about them now."

"They’re in the dojo," the Chinese boy explained, "talking. Don’t bother trying to eavesdrop, I’ve got it spelled so tight you couldn’t here an atomic blast go off in there."

Everyone just stared at him… save for Nabiki, who already understood the situation.

"They’ve both complained that they never have time alone without being interrupted. I’ve seen to it that only the Gods themselves can interrupt them. Don’t even bother trying.

"They’ll come out when the want to."

 

After dinner, Xian Mao and Nabiki returned to their vigilant watch of the dojo. They sat in companionable silence as the sun set.

"Xian Mao?" asked Nabiki after a while. "Do you have any nicknames? Something shorter, easier to say?"

"A couple. Some people just take my name apart, calling me Xian, or Mao. Some of the other acolytes at the temple called me ‘Baka’ until I learned Japanese… then they found somewhere else to be. When I first opened the Fourth Door, I was called "Claw" for a while, because for days after, my aura had claws. Other than that…" He shook his head. "None."

"Well, I can’t call you ‘baka’, that’s Ranma," they both chuckled, "and ‘claw’ is sort of odd… Mao is awkward, so I guess I’ll call you Xian… okay?"

"Fine by me…"

The wall behind them shimmered.

"They’re finally coming out," Xian Mao explained.

"Mmmm…" said Nabiki, getting up slowly, then turning to her first real friend in years. "You know, I really don’t have any experience in this… just a few manga and watching this chaos around me…"

"As incompetent as I am, hunh? Care to try anyway?"

Nabiki smiled… the first genuine smile in some time, and kissed him on the forehead. "Yes."

The shell collapsed, and they could here what was obviously the tail end of the conversation.

"RANMA NO BAKA!!!"

"At least," he said with wry exasperation as the Dojo door opened, "we have a very excellent example of what NOT to do…"

"Yeah…"

 

 

Akane lie on her bed, late that night, thinking hard.

"Come in," she said absently as someone knocked on her door.

Nabiki walked in.

"So, what’d you and Ranma talk about?"

"Everything."

"Come to any decisions?"

A pause. A long one.

"Yes. He… he told me he loves me… that he… He asked me to marry him FOR REAL! But the baka doesn’t know what to do about Ukyou or Shampoo…"

"Do you?"

"Well… no… but he has to get rid of them…"

"Leave that, little sister, to me."

"What? Why? …How much?"

"Leave it to me, no charge. As to why… I think Xian-kun put it best: ‘…to heal the wound I’ve indirectly caused’."

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

Fate had shifted against her, and Khu Lon knew it. That damned Xian Mao had changed something, and the worst part was that Khu Lon couldn’t tell what!

Her scrying attempts had been blocked, and she’d been too upset to actually investigate in person.

And Xian Pu and Mu Tsu were out of the question. They must -not- learn that she was scared. Must NOT!

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Chapter Ten: "XVI The Tower"

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

Somewhere, out in the wilds of Africa, pining for well-fed women and black lace lingerie, Happosai decided that the time had come for him to return to Nerima.

 

 

"Well, Ranma, how do you feel?"

"I feel… pretty good, actually."

"Excellent. Because, by the time I’m done with you this evening, you’re gonna feel like shit… and you’re gonna be just fine in comparison to me."

Ranma blanched a little, but nodded.

"Come with me to the dojo."

 

In the center of a circle drawn in chalk, Ranma sat across from Xian Mao.

"Relax, and begin a deep breathing exercise. One… Two… Three… Four… yes, very good. Now, concentrate on the Neko-ken… bring it out… let it fill you, but do not let it control yo…"

SPLASH!

"Ranma, m’boy, why don’t you just try on this bra for me!"

Ranma didn’t even respond as a shriveled old man no more than three feet high latched onto her breasts.

Xian Mao could feel the girl/boy struggling against the Neko-ken, holding it at bay… a battle that Ranma could under no circumstances loose: the odd, corrupted Yin Incarnation was struggling to break through the Ninth Gate.

The Chinese priest of Wang-Mao-Yue grabbed the shriveled old pervert and tore him from Ranma’s chest. The little bastard happened to take most of Ranma’s shirt with him, leaving the girl/boy’s breasts exposed.

"Goodie!" the little wretch cried, trying to squirm from Xian Mao’s grasp.

"I don’t know who you are… -what- you are… but Ranma is busy right now. So why don’t you come back when we have time to deal with you?"

The ancient creature turned to see the blazing silver light of Xian Mao’s cat-slit eyes.

"Oopsie," it said, as the young man blasted him out of the dojo with a Ki-bolt of pure rage.

Attention already back on Ranma, Xian Mao pressed his forehead to the red-head’s brow and saw the "Path of Doors" that was the aethral representation of the Neko-ken…

 

 

Xian Mao stood silently in the corridor of Ranma’s mind that housed the Cat Fist. Images of cats swarmed everywhere… hungry cats, hungry for fish sausage and other goodies, delivered in the form of a young boy thrown by his father into a pit. All of the Doors rattled, as the corrupted Yin Incarnation struggled to gain control of Ranma’s mind. At each of the Nine Doors, stood a shadowy image of the young martial artist (male, in his mind’s eye), strength waning as the battle for his soul raged on.

Xian Mao walked up to the First Gate, and gently pressed it closed. As the door vanished, so did the image of Ranma—it’s strength returning to the others.

The Second, Third, and Forth Gates were closed in the same manner.

Then, on his own, Ranma closed the Fifth Door. With new hope, the images of Ranma struggled against the Gates, closing the remaining four one by one: Sixth, Seventh, Eighth, Ninth.

At the end of the corridor, the Tenth gate lay open, unguarded. Irritated at it’s defeat, the twisted, dark form of the Yin Incarnation shambled out.

Ranma looked at Xian Mao for help, but the young priest shook his head.

"This fight is yours, Ranma. You must defeat your own demons alone."

Nodding, Ranma faced the warped Tiger. The Tiger roared at him in rage, Ranma roared back, bringing all his will to bear. Around him, his aura flared to life, and stabilized. The Tiger roared again, and stepped foreword. Ranma, too, took a step foreword, bringing himself face to face with the Tiger. He roared, and the Yang Force of the Dragon Manifested around him, driving the Tiger back through the Great Gate, slamming it closed, and obliterating it.

Martial artist and would-be monk both vanished as the Path of Doors began to crumble…

 

 

Ranma collapsed against Xian Mao, breathing as hard as if he’d just spent the entire day fighting demons. Xian Mao, in return, used Ranma’s prone form for support.

Sometime along the way, Akane and Nabiki had show up in the dojo to watch.

"Is it done?" asked Akane.

"It is done."

Nabiki breathed a sigh of relief… neither Ranma nor Xian seemed to have suffered much…

"What happened to Ranma’s shirt?"

Xian blinked, then looked down, then looked up again quickly.

"Some old freak came in and splashed Ranma, then jumped on his… her chest, waving around a bra. I pulled the thing off, and Ranma’s shirt came with."

"Happosai," Akane muttered.

"Happosai? As in, extraordinary pervert, martial arts master, founder of the Anything Goes School?"

Nabiki nodded, "Of which the School of Indiscriminate Grappling is a branch-off."

"Ah…"

Simultaneously, the door and the wall opposite it burst inward.

"What have you done to Ranma?" demanded the wizened figure where a wall should have been.

"What have you done to Son-in-law?" demanded the shriveled figure where the door had just been.

Happosai, and Cologne respectively.

Exhausted and irritated, something inside of Xian Mao snapped.

He stood up, crossed his arms, and looked back and forth from one ancient to the other.

"I just cured him of his fear of cats, and closed off his access to the Doors of the Neko-ken."

"Bah!" said Cologne, "You could have done no such thing!"

"Who are you to muck around in my heir’s head?" demanded Happosai.

"If Son-in-law is damaged in any way…"

"If you’ve hurt my Ranma-sweetums…"

Akane and Nabiki had already dragged Ranma away, knowing -BIG SHIT- was about to hit the fan. Xian Mao’s eyes blazed brilliant white for a second, then with deliberately slow grace, he raised his right arm over his head and curled his left up so that they formed a circle; bringing his left knee up so that his left foot rested on his right knee, he shifted his hip slightly to the right.

His aura flared into the visible spectrum, a perfect black teardrop, forming the Yin "9" of the "69" Yin-Yang. In the circle made with his arms, a sphere of pure white blazed to life.

Consciously, deliberately, and with full knowledge of it’s consequences, Xian Mao opened the Ninth Gate: Vengeance and Annihilation.

The force of the Yin Manifestation utterly destroyed the dojo, tearing a twenty foot diameter crater in the ground.

Around Xian Mao, the shadowy image of a great Tiger mimicked his motions.

The leaden weight of fear settled in the two ancient one’s hearts. Cologne had refused to believe the information she’d acquired: that this boy truly had mastered the Neko-ken, and that he was most likely to become the next Yin Avatar. Happosai had heard of the boy as well, even seen him once, ‘bout a year back, but had failed to recognize this young man as the boy he’d seen in the temple of Wang-Mao-Yue.

Now they knew their error.

"Happosai," the quiet/booming/snarling voice/growl of Xian Mao intoned, "for your crimes against Ranma, and the women you have molested, I claim Vengeance upon you!"

The strike was swift, and Happosai very nearly failed to dodge it: the massive Tiger-aura shrank down to a tight fit over the boy’s body, and he struck out with a leaping slash from foot-long foreclaws.

Even evading the strike, however, Happosai still felt it’s force crash against his aura, and it was all he could do to hold it stable. In the effort of holding his Ki field together, however, the old man failed to see the follow-up strike, which sent him crashing three feet deep into the ground, aura shredded and shattered, body broken and bleeding.

Xian Mao turned to face Cologne.

"Khu Lon, with your actions you have hurt Ranma, your granddaughter Xian Pu, Mu Tsu, and have brought shame to your entire tribe. In the name of Justice, I claim Vengeance upon you!"

Khu Lon was not a fool. She had seen what this youth had just done to Happi and the Tendou residence: utter destruction.

No, she was not a fool; and at heart, she was a coward.

Khu Lon turned an fled, but not fast enough.

Xian Mao’s claws caught her in the back, and shredded her flesh, her Ki, and her nearly-cast teleportation spell. Khu Lon vanished, and it was anyone’s guess if she would ever be seen again.

 

 

When Xian Mao woke, his head was resting in Nabiki’s lap.

"Where am I?"

"My bedroom."

Stunned silence.

"Wow. I guess I must really be worth something if you’ll keep me after all the damage I just did."

"Well, you are kinda’ cute. Besides," she said, stroking his hair, "if I throw you out, how can I make sure you help pay for said damage?"

 

 

 

 

*****

 

 

 

 

Xian Mao was finding it quite difficult to think of anything truly constructive.

Sure, he’d managed to succeed where many had failed: force Ranma into making his choice.

Sure, he’d done the well-nigh impossible in not only hospitalizing Happosai, but in also vanquishing Cologne.

Sure, he’d just done around 28 million Yen worth of property damage to the Tendou dojo, and had Tendou Soun so pissed off that everyone was waiting for the Raging Demon-Head Technique to come out of the woodwork.

But the only thing his mind could focus on at all was that -despite- all of the above (especially the last) Tendou Nabiki—a woman possessed of great beauty and a -very- fine mind—found some value in him.

 

 

 

The True Cat Fist

by Jeff Groves

Epilogue: Conclusions and Beginnings

neko-sama@juno.com

 

 

Xian Mao hadn’t been unconscious as long as he’d assumed.

He’d woken up no more than ten minutes after Khu Lon had vanished. So, as he shambled down the stairs of the Tendou residence and out the door to survey the damage he’d done (and quite likely have to pay for… somehow), it was hardly surprising to find that the entire "cast and crew" was running in… through the gate, through the wall, over the gate, over the wall… however was appropriate for each individual.

Within minutes, everyone was there: Shampoo, Mousse, Kuno, Kodachi (jeeze! Hadn’t she given up -yet-?), Ukyou, and Ryouga… each identified for him by Nabiki.

With a haggard sigh, and the knowledge that he’d be regretting it for days… maybe weeks to come, Xian Mao drug his thumb along one of his fangs, drawing blood and uttering the most powerful prayer spell he knew: "May the Gods and my Ancestors grant me the Strength, Wisdom, and Power to do that which I need to do…"

Supporting him as she was, Nabiki could feel the energy that poured into him from the earth and the heavens.

"Where Airen? What happen?"

"Where’s that cur Saotome? What has he done, now?"

"What vile deed has the dark sorcerer Saotome done, this time?"

"Hohohohohohohohoho! Where’s my Ranma-sama? Who has done this?"

"Ranchan! Where is that jackass? Is he all right?"

"Ranma! What have you done, now? If you’ve hurt Akane…"

Even after the Greater Invocation of the Divine, Xian Mao still didn’t trust himself to walk without support, so he continued to lean into Nabiki’s support… besides, he liked having her arm around him.

"Hold on, everyone," he croaked.

No one heard him. All the rivalries had already broken into a fight

"Oh, Xian Pu, my darling! Maybe that wretch is dead, and we can finally wed!"

"I’m not Shampoo, jackass! Hay, Amazon bimbo! Come get your boyfriend off of me!"

"Stupid Mousse no Shampoo’s boyfriend!"

"What are you two peasant girls doing here? Ranma-sama is mine!"

"So, the vile enslaver Saotome has captured you lovely women, as well as my dear Akane and Pig-tailed-girl? Fear not! I, Kuno Tatewake, will rescue you!"

"SHUT UP!" (from three sources simultaneously, each followed by a large blunt object to Kuno’s head.)

"RANMA, IF YOU’VE HURT AKANE, YOU DIE!"

Xian Mao shuddered, and drew the borrowed power of the Invocation to him.

"-SILENCE!-" he screamed in a voice that might very well have stopped them dead even without the magickal Command behind it. "Kodachi, I command the: BE GONE! You have heard from Ranma’s own mouth that you are as a rabid dog to him! I banished you once, I can do so again!"

An idle threat, actually; exhausted as he was, the Invocation gave him the strength to stand (maybe) and to Work a few small magicks… magicks that he would have to work subtly and carefully to not overdraw and risk death or worse.

"To the rest of you I say this: The damage done here… the magickal surge some of you may have felt. That was my work. If any of you care to find out exactly what happened, you can come back and ask me any time after say… next Tuesday. If you’re lucky, I’ll be awake by then."

Then, knowing that he had passed his limits long ago, Xian Mao gracelessly passed out.

 

 

Xian Mao—much to his surprise—woke up well before Tuesday.

In fact, he woke up Saturday morning.

"Ah, awake I see."

He didn’t recognize the voice, he didn’t recognize the surroundings. Consequently, he was less than pleased with the situation. Quickly, the young man rolled off of the table he’d been laid out on, pulling up in a fluid, graceful crouch that screamed "Phase One".

Dr. Tofu Ono blinked in surprise at the antagonistic attitude his patient had taken.

"What’s the matter? I’m not going to hurt you… after all," he said, smiling wryly, "if you’ve managed to catch Nabiki’s heart, there’s very little she wouldn’t do to someone who hurt you."

This startled Xian Mao out of his "animal trapped in a corner" mindset, and he closed the First Door, standing like a normal person… or, at least as close to normal as anyone who had mastered the Neko-ken can do.

"You know Nabiki, hunh?"

"Of course. I’m Tofu Ono, their family doctor."

"Hail, Magus," Xian said formally, bowing to the young doctor. "I am Xian Mao, of the Wang-Mao-Yue temple. Forgive me for not recognizing you for what you are."

Tofu blinked, then smiled. "Hide it well, don’t I? Actually, I’m not Magus, just well informed. Actually, I’m just a doctor with extensive knowledge of Feng Shui, acupuncture, acupressure, shiatsu, and odd magicks… the latter learned entirely since meeting Ranma."

Xian Mao shrugged. "They are all names, I guess. Thank you for reviving me. Anything happen that I should know about while I was out?"

"Well, shortly after you passed out, the Neighborhood Watch showed up, demanding to know what had happened. After learning that the chaos and destruction had happened in the vanquishing of Happosai, they decided that they were going to repay the Tendous (who claimed credit) for finally dealing with the panty thief. Most of the money it will take to restore the dojo is going to come from there. Ranma offered to teach some basic self-defense courses to help pay, as well."

"Wow." He’d been afraid he’d have to pay for the damage by himself… something he had no idea how to do. "Can I check out yet, Doc?"

"Sure, I guess. Why such a hurry."

"Nabiki’s probably worried."

 

 

Xian Mao gaped at the damage he’d done. Even with repairs already begun, the devastation was incredible.

"Impressive, isn’t it?"

It took a few moments for him to find enough of his voice to answer.

"I don’t think that’s the word I’d use…"

Nabiki quirked an eyebrow at him, frowning slightly.

"Something more like… there’s no word for it in Japanese… a mix of unreal, morally wrong, unjust, and unbelievable….

"You take me into your home, your heart… and this is how I repay you…

"Is there any way you can forgive me, Nabiki? Can your family?"

Nabiki’s mask of anger fell, and she put her arm around his waist. "Kasumi… I’m not even sure she noticed. Akane will forgive you anything for helping her and Ranma, and curing Ranma of his fear of cats… which we tested yesterday: completely cured… said he could almost here the little kitten’s thoughts. Mr. Saotome will be grateful until the end of time for curing his son, and for ridding him of Happosai’s legacy. Otousan will come around when he realizes what you’ve done for his precious youngest daughter and her fiancee… and will be ready to worship you when he figures out that Happosai is out of commission.

"As for myself…"

Xian Mao, not looking at her face, flinched.

"… I’ve already forgiven you."

And she kissed him.

 

 

 

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

well, there’s that.

 

Tell me what you think, people.

I didn’t get to incorporate all the ideas that I’d wanted to, but there we are.

 

And what of the suitors, you may ask?

 

Truth be told, some of them (Shampoo, Ryouga and Ukyou, namely) couldn’t wait until Tuesday, so they showed up on the Tendou doorstep Friday night, demanding to get at least a partial version of what had happened.

 

Everyone rejoiced at Happosai’s defeat, and no one (not even Shampoo) could bring themselves to be sad at the departure of Cologne.

 

But the rest of the news, namely "Ranma’s Choice", struck them all like a ton of bricks. Chaos might have ensued at that point, but then, as one, eveyone had looked out the window at the decimated dojo, and thought about Tuesday, when the strange Chinese boy who had taken out both ancients woke up, and decided that he’d most likely hunt them down… again, as one, they scoured the house for Soun’s liquor cabinet and ransacked it.

 

As the night wore on, the three drunken mourners got even louder. So, in an attempt to shut them up, they were doused with ice water.

Needles to say, Akane was less than pleased to discover Ryouga’s secret. Ukyou, still drunk as a sailor, found it very amusing: even after she had passed out, she was still muttering about "silly widdle piggie".

 

That, folks, is that.

 

No, it’s not over, there’s too much I still want to do with these people:

Ryouga-Ukyou hook-up

Xian Pu-Mu Tus hook-up

Ranma-Akane marriage

Xian Mao-Nabiki romance

return of Happosai and Cologne

torture of Soun and Genma

misc. amusing zaniness

so look foreword to the sequel series: Quest For the Dragon Fist

 

anyone see that coming?

 

One last thing: if anyone wants to find out EXACTLY what happened in the dojo between Ranma and Akane, e-mail me, and I’ll send you the side-story as soon as it’s writ… I’d post, ‘cept that my widdle bro also reads the newsgroup and I really don’t want to write a lemon-scent for him to read.

 

Thanx for reading!

C&C please!

Email to neko-sama@juno.com